EyeCancer's Rant : How To Improve Your Story By leaps and Bounds
by EyeCancer
Summary: You have an idea for a RWBY story. It seems like a good idea in your head, an uncompromising badass, he can do anything and everything and gets ALL the girls. The issue? No one likes your character or story. Here are a few ideas and tips to improve writing, grammar, character development, and ideas.
1. Chapter 1: Creating a Character 1

**I was unhappy with my writing for the longest time, so I decided to do something about it. A few reviewers stated that "this doesn't belong here," and that this was a rant. They were right. So without further interruption, lets try this again.**

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Chapter 1: Creating a character with reincarnation

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You probably came here because you wanted to better your writing, make people enjoy your stories. I have some news for you.

That's not possible.

Your main character is called a Mary sue, or the male counterpart Gary Stu, a character with no weakness or flaws. A character that doesn't struggle with anything, a character that doesn't have to work for anything, like an rpg character playing on the easiest difficulty. A character that gets everything right, and is never wrong. People always agree with your character. Everybody likes them, or is intrigued by them. Everyone views this person as handsome or beautiful. They may even be a god. A perfect person, in every sense of the word.

And also very, very boring.

Not many people want to read a story about someone who never struggles, they want someone they can relate to. Someone who struggled for what they wanted. Sure sometimes a story about an overpowered badass saving the day is good, but in comparison to a character that achieved their goal through blood, sweat, and tears?

They fall short.

A good example of this is going out and building a retaining wall in your backyard. Sure you could pay some people to do it for you, or you could buy the bricks, sand, gravel, and cement that you need to do it yourself. It's much more rewarding to do it yourself. You get this feeling that you accomplished something. So that you can say " I built that, and I'm proud of it!"

Instead of saying, "Wow that's a nice wall," you can say "Wow, **I** built that wall"

Now onto getting your character into your story. There are a few ways and a few pro's and con's to each way.

The first is being a reincarnated self-insert into the world of Remnant. How this works is that you, the author of the story, die in the real world somehow. You then wake up as a baby, a new life.  
Reincarnation, by definition, is the belief that each life started out as a previous life form, and that when they die they will be born again as a new life-form. This could be your ticket into Remnant.

The pros of this method are many, and there are a few ideas to go along with it as well. The first being that you have a family, a mother and a father, maybe a few siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, you name it. These people can be either major characters that influence your character in the world, or minor charcters to be done with as you please. Like killed off at the age of six, or abandoned at birth.  
The second benefit is up to you or not, your character's body is native to the world, and therefore, may posses traits of that world or not at your discretion. Like faunus traits, such as cat ears, or a reptile tail. Do some research on animals if you are going to make your character a faunus though, there are cooler animals out there than a wolf, or a dog. Like a honey badger, they have a thick tough skin that makes them immune to bee stings and some forms of venom, as well as being fearless. I guess you could say that a honey badger has such a thick skin that it just doesn't have to give a shit.  
Our final pro is that you may have fore knowledge of events in the show. This is essentially knowing the future.

The cons of reincarnation are just as numerous, if not more, the first being that it is far-fetched and a bit overused.  
Another con being that, if you decided to reincarnate, it's random, you don't know what family you will end up with, and the chances are low that you will end up related to Weiss or Ruby, are low. Furthermore you have a 1/5 chance of ending up near Vale, there is also, Mistral, Mantle/Atlas, Vacuo, and Menagerie, this can also be a pro as you can world build these areas, make them as you see fit.  
Another con may be that, because your soul is foreign, you may or may not have an aura. Aura in RWBY is defined as the physical manifestation of the soul, and the semblance a power based on you personality. If your soul if foreign, and the body native, you may run into problems. As we here in the real world know that the soul is something more philosophical and less physical, unlike in RWBY where both is true, we have no way of determining for sure that we can even have a soul in the first place.

So lets review

 **Pros**

1.) Being reincarnated, you start as a baby a set number of years before cannon to your pleasure.

2.) You have a native body

3.) You have a family for sure

 **Cons**

1.) It's overused for self-inserts

2.) The chances of being related to the original characters is slim

3.) You may not have aura due to having a foreign soul.

Some of these pros and cons can blend and become neutral points to pick and choose at will

 **Neutral points to cherry-pick**

1.) You can create major or minor characters for your family and do whatever you want with them

An idea for this is your mother dies in childbirth, so you were raised by your father alone. Or both your parents died when you were an age, and you now like with your aunt and uncle. Or you only have a mother and your father dies before you were born.

My point with this, is that it is YOUR character's family, you can do whatever you want with it, just don't turn into that edgy faggot that has his whole family killed before his eyes, and now walks the earth as an avenger, hunting his family's killer(s). Be real, you aren't going to be that kid that raises themselves. You will probably end up on the streets, in which case a random stranger will come along and adopt you, they probably won't be special, just a caring guy that wants to do the right thing.

2.) You can pick and choose how your aura will work

It can be a major story point if your character doesn't have aura. Picture your character encountering all sorts of bad things, escaping by the hair on his head. It certainly seems dangerous, and you may or may not get hurt by messing up. It could be a comedic point or a very serious disability depending on the story you are writing. Depending on the way you write your Grimm into working, this can be a good thing. No aura? No problem! The Grimm can't sense you if you have no soul, the Grimm can't see thing's without souls, the Grimm won't hunt things without souls, the list goes on.

3.) You probably won't end up related to the main characters.

This could give you the ability to expand on lesser known kingdoms. Your character comes from Atlas? What is it like? How cold is it? Do they wear snow clothes? What does the city look like? What does your family do? Do you plan on becoming a huntsman? etc. etc.

The point I'm making is that when it comes to a story, you are the author, do what you like, just try to be real. A man who has never learned how to forge a weapon will not instantly get it right the first time. If you don't know how to wire a house together, you WILL get it wrong the first time, and the second time, and the third time. Until you sit down and learn about something, you will not know how to do it. If you want to give your character a skill, have them go through the steps to learn it. If it's something you don't know how to do yourself, do research on the subject and learn a bit. In a school, if you never learned algebra, you will not instantly know how to do it, it has to be taught slowly, spoon-feeding you information, until you can do it yourself. You will mess up and get things wrong.

Unless you are The Gamer or poses his powers, that's just cheating then and every point I made gets thrown out the window. Fuck everything, right? Just eat the fucking book containing the relevant information, and then level the skill up. Instant mastery in just a few short months.

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A few ideas up for grabs. (Don't mention me at all if you decide to use these, I don't like getting credit for this)

1.) You are reincarnated, you have no aura, you live with your grandfather, the Grimm do nothing to you. Watch every major research facility, huntsman academy, and government try to get their hand on you to see how you work.

2.) You are reincarnated, you have can't get aura, you never watched the show, you live with your parents, the Grimm hunt you like any other person and have hurt you. You got lucky once. A story taking place from a person without powers, in a dangerous, uncaring, world that doesn't forgive mistakes.

3.) You are reincarnated, you have aura, you have a family, Grimm chase you like anyone else, you are trained by your huntsman family members, you just want to be a common worker and not a hero, to bad you're one of the best. You religiously watched the show everyday for three years. A forced huntsman story that would focus on the character growing into this idea and accepting that they are a hero. All his relationships will start off poorly, he works alone, he is slightly suicidal. He will fix his relationships with others towards the end.


	2. Chapter 2: Creating a Character 2

Chapter 2

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So last chapter we covered reincarnation, being reborn through death over and over again as a new being. This chapter will focus on portals, multidimensional or other kinds.

The pros and cons of portals can vary, if you made the portal, you can prepare yourself with whatever you want, bring anything you want, or just stuff your car full of stuff you think you will need. Everything is in hand, your affairs are sorted, just open the portal and go through.

But what if the portal is random? What if you don't have control of it? Then that means that you were the (un)lucky sap who fell or walked in. You would only have what you have on hand at the time. For example, when I leave for work, I take my phone, my wallet, a lighter, and a pack of cigarettes. If I fell into a portal that went to Remnant, I would only have a phone, one that may or may not work. I would have a wallet with currency I couldn't spend. A drivers license that will not help any government identify me as I wouldn't have a valid ID. A lighter is useful as smoke attracts people, so I could eventually find help if the Grimm don't get to me first.

It would be a survival situation and one that you and I will not be prepared for. I guarantee that many of us have not taken a wilderness survival class, and I can fully guarantee that none of us have taken a class that specializes in teaching you how to defend yourself against monsters that will actively hunt you for nothing more than sport.

But all is not lost.

Again the pros and cons vary from portal to portal, but as a general you can guarantee a few things. The first being that it will be YOU or your character going through a portal, which means that disabilities, body weight, muscle density, bone structure, and blood type will remain the same. In fact, nothing will change at all. Second is that while you have a proof of existence here in the real world, on Remnant there will be no evidence that you exist at all. No birth certificate, no bank accounts, no SSID, no paper trail at all. Third you will not be a native, so any diseases you have or have encountered, the people of remnant may not have, so a common cold can literally kill them. Not to mention if you aren't vaccinated, if you go while you have measles, mumps, chickenpox, diphtheria, polio, or however unlikely smallpox? You could destroy the world with just a touch.

The same can be said for others. Remnant may have diseases that we will have never encountered. One that they get once and then they never get it again, but when we get it, just like the American Indians and smallpox, will kill us effectively and quickly.

A disease that turn your brain to mush an kills you slowly? very much possible in this new world, one that the native people are immune to

Consider that I am immune to highly contagious diseases that feed on aura. This disease slowly causes the shielding and healing properties of aura to fail and will eventually kill the person it is attached to. I come in contact with the disease and it does nothing to me. I am immune because the disease affects aura. If I go near people with a disease that spreads through contact, it hides in my clothes, in me, on my skin, and briefly in the air that I breath out. Going into a city, think of all the people I come in contact with, people who brush past me on the side walk, people in a park, in a store, some get in bullheads and it spreads to other cities and even the huntsman academies. A walking Petri dish that has no seal, no cover, and is in contact with the general public. A pandemic in the making. A global contagion.

It's fun to imagine things isn't it?

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Lets review!

Pros:

1.) You stay you, nothing changes

Fat, athletic, skinny, ugly, handsome, comely, beautiful, god-like, or whatever you are you stay you! That's a guarantee!

2.) If your character made the portal you can bring whatever you want and be prepared!

Take a gun, take a knife, take a phone and charger, take a car, take grandma, take anything you need to be prepared.

Cons:

1.) Staying yourself, you bring diseases not native to Remnant and can be affected by native diseases and bacteria

Viruses spread and disease can cripple a population in less than a year. You don't even need to be present, touch one and done. Expose the people of Remnant to Malaria, Yellow Fever, Polio, Cholera, Scarlet Fever, Typhoid, and Spanish Flu. Kill people of all ages with Whooping Cough, a disease that these people have no immunity to. Unleash the swine flu with a touch and devastate an already dwindling population. Take your pick, as there are about 30,000 known diseases to man. Or be cut down by a common children's disease that you have no way to fight off.

2.) If the portal was random, you probably only have what is currently in your pockets.

A nightmare situation for anyone, lost and confused, you would have no clue as to where you are. A nightmare situation as the beasts of darkness try to kill you. No water purification tablets, no tent, no car, no grandma. Just you and the things in your pockets. Better hope that wallet is made of leather, because that may be your only meal for the next few days.

Neutral points:

1.)You can save and/or kill everyone on remnant with plague

A neutral point as this could be a goal or something unintentional.

2.)No paper trail

No information about you anywhere, a burden and a gift. The perfect spy for any side of the conflict. No way to purchase a home, no bank account, and no way to receive medical care, police help, or anything that requires an ID of any kind.

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A few ideas (Please do not mention me if you use them):

1.) A man appears through a portal from up high. Luckily your fall was broken by Roman Torchwick. This man would impersonate him in a cold and unforgiving world.

2.) A man appears through a portal just outside of Beacon at the start of the series. He looks exactly like a canon student. A story about a man trying to prevent the disasters, fighting against the odds, and eventually getting a happy ending with a single person. (You could even insert an epilogue from the point of view of the characters children (or wife) describing their father's (or husband's) death.

3.) A mystery story about a new disease spreading through (insert city or town here). Patient Zero? Your character. Disease? Any one of them, there are so many out there that some are just being discovered or classified.

4.) Use your brain.


	3. Chapter 3: Time of Arrival

**I decided to do something different this time.**

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Now that you have arrived in the world of remnant, it's time to figure out when you ended up. How close you are to canon events and such.

Beacon is a school and most schools start around September, although this isn't always true as some start in October and some are year round schools. We don't know the year in the show, so let's assume they use a different calendar counting from the great war. This war happened about one-hundred twenty years ago so we can assume that the first semester of Beacon starts on September 1st, 120 AGW (After Great War).

Now maybe this isn't true. Maybe they have the same Gregorian calendar a we do, maybe they use a lunar calendar like Jews do to keep track of holidays, or maybe they have their own calendar with 396 of our years to one of their years, a Mayan long-year in other words.

This is important as this can be used to you advantage. If you arrive say, eight years before canon starts, You can use this to set up a business, get a house, get a driver's license or their equivalent of one, re-introduce a common technology or if you're de-aged, get adopted.

This can also be a curse, if you show up too early or too late to the party. If you are late, you can show up anywhere between the start of canon in the dust shop, or at the fall of beacon, or even years after canon. If you are too early, like sixty to seventy years before canon, you may die of old age before you even get the chance to meet anyone important.

But again the best time to arrive before the canon events of the show are between forty to two years before a show starts, as you have enough time to build important relationships, get connections, and most importantly, prepare for all the bad shit that happens. You can grow up as a childhood friend of an important lead character, be an older sibling or parent of influential people, and even get rich quick.

Imagine if you would, growing up with Adam Taurus, watching him from across the street and playing games together. A best friend to each other or a brother in all but blood. You would watch him get involved with the White Fang and support him when they were peaceful.

Then later in life, you watch him turn into a darker version of the friend you knew, and you get a choice. Abandon your friend and watch him get darker, or be there for him and help him see that what they are doing isn't right.

An important person like Adam can be used to your advantage, gaining influence with other's or influencing his actions and making him into what ever you want.

And this is true with every character, protagonist, antagonist, and supporting character in the show. A father to Taiyang, and a respected grandfather to Yang and Ruby, can shape their morals and view of the world. A Brother to Cinder and a way to care for someone who needs it, changing morals, and reasons behind their actions.

A friend of Cardin's and a way to curb or strengthen his attitude at the beginning of canon. An older brother to Jaune could be someone who he looks up to, and a reason for him to fake his way into beacon, to be like his cool older brother.

An uncle to Mercury could be someone who fought for years for custody of his nephew, as he knew how bad things were at home. When Mercury disappeared, only for them to find each other later, Mercury could go from someone who cares about his uncle, to someone who resents him for not being there for him.

Weiss's aunt, someone who cared for her when her mother died (we don't know the status of her mother, but it's believed she died.)

There is so much you can do with your story depending on the time of arrival, you can be anyone and do anything. Just avoid showing up in the dust shop with a scythe, as at that point it's just a five-man team, canon rewrite, which show's you have no creativity and need to copy and paste from the show in order to do anything. Even some terrible authors with bad stories have more creativity than someone who just rewrites canon with an extra character.

If you arrive late to the party you can be an unsung hero, someone who does good things, but is never given any recognition for their efforts. If you arrive early, you can be prepared.

The time that you arrive is as important as the character itself, as this can shape the people around them, and the way they interact with the world.

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 **The pros and cons:**

There are no pros and cons, just different dynamics.

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 **A few ideas** :

1.) You are Qrow and Raven's father, create a story about your introduction to them, your relationship with them, and eventually after about thirty years, your relationship with Yang and how this influenced the character's and their new choices.

2.) You are Glynda's younger brother, she seems to blame you for the death of your mother on the account of your disfigurement. It's too bad you have to work with her as Beacon's new head chef, not to mention you prepare the recipes from your mother's cook book.

3.) You are Ozpin's grandson, explore the world as a young child a year before canon starts, and then your coping with life after your only living relative is gone.

4.) You are Emerald's best friend, if only she could see that the people she get's involved with don't always have her best interests at heart.

5.) You are the founder of a major household franchise, because of your money and influence, you become fast friends with Weiss' mother. A story about the death of both Weiss parents when she was young, and you, the Godfather, raising her. What a disappointment the Schnee children are to you.


	4. Chapter 4: Character Creation 1

Chapter four.

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While we have not covered all of the ways to get to Remnant, such as falling asleep or space travel, I think we can move on to other things now.

Congratulations! You made it into your new world! Adventure awaits you wherever you woke up! Now it's time to decide how you look. Appearances are everything, from first impressions to the subconscious thoughts in our own brain telling us how to react to someone else, we are always judging other people. It's not as hard as you think to describe an appearance. A question to ask yourself before you decide how you look would be will this be an OC story, a Self-Insert story, or both?

If you are a self-insert that can mean two things, you are either controlling someone else's body with all the good and bad, or you are yourself with all your strengths and flaws. It'snot too complicated to answer and decide for this one.

If you are an OC, then you must figure out your race first, Remnant has two races on it to choose from. Here are the Pro's and cons of each,

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 **Human**

 **Pros:**

•Little chance for discrimination based on race

•People of your race will be more likely to help you

•You can go almost anywhere and receive service

 **Cons:**

•Squishy body is like everyone else, no extra armor or special attributes, just a regular guy

•Poor to no night vision

•The White Fang and any associated Faunus hate you automatically

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 **Faunus**

 **Pros:**

•A animal traits of your choice can enhance your body beyond that of a man (all-natural equine-dong enhancement anyone?)

•Night vision to see in the dead of night

•White Fang membership is available if you need it

•More trustworthy to other members of your species.

•Cute tail options

 **Cons:**

•You may face discrimination

•Animal traits do come with a cost (Cannot erect horse-dong for fear of blood pressure dropping and heart stopping)

•Fight or flight instinct may be stronger

•Business owners reserve the right to refuse service to anyone, especially you

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Now that you have decided your race, it's time for the most controversial question of the twenty-first century, are you a boy or a girl? ***** This will determine how others treat you, some of your biological needs and explain certain behaviors that are ingrained as naturally. Men and women think very differently, and this is part of what makes romantic relationships with others difficult.

Then comes a bunch of Fallout 4 character creation scenarios, skin colour, eye colour, hair colour, ear shape, nose size, jaw line, etc.

We don't need to hear about this stuff in the story right away, you can reveal bits of this at a time. You could write that your Faunus boy never really looked at their eyes since coming here, so they look in the mirror, deep green eyes stare back at them, like the colour of spring maple leaves. You could write that your girl character brushes a lock of hair out of her face, golden curls falling in a waterfall of straw coloured locks.

If you are a faunus, then think hard about what animal you are picking. For example a cat has four times the muscle density of a human. This means that a faunus with the muscle density of a cat is four times stronger and faster than a regular person. This also comes with the side affect of requiring a large amount of calories in order not to starve to death. Horns are easy to grab a hold of and provide excellent leverage for other people to pull you around. Increased hearing comes with noise sensitivity, this means flashbangs are super effective against you. Wings are detrimental due to the size needed and other changes needed to even achieve flight, not to mention the amount of muscle and energy needed to even glide is obscene. Keep your traits real and take the weaknesses that come with enhanced anything. Safe bets for traits are various eye colours and pupil shapes.

Clothing changes often and frequently so there isn't really a reason to talk about it other than when a major change happens like going from rags and a cloak to a fancy suit, or a school uniform to a bath towel. If you are one of those people that only dress in one pair of underwear your whole life, then I suggest getting your physical soon and buying more clothing. Serious health problems can occur from wearing the same clothing for too long, including necrosis in the genital area.

Now I'm going to make a character as an example.

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His name was Izekiel

At least, that's what the identification card in his hand said. Izekiel Brozovy, age 40, born on the 53rd day of the year 621, male, human. The weight and height were in a unit he was unfamiliar with. With no way to determine how long a "heel" was, and no clue how the people here weighed "round" he had no basis for how tall something was, nor a clue how much something weighed. He knew he was about 5 foot 10 inches, but the tallest person he ever saw here was only chin height.

He doesn't remember much of anything at all, his time in the new world he found himself in, making him mentally over a hundred years old.

He remembers his time serving in the academy, his time serving the Confederacy of America, his wife, their children, and of course his death.

 _Robert_ , he thought, _that was my name_.

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In this example we created an old man in a young mans body, his name was Robert, he is an OC, we have established that he is tall for the people around him, a race, gender, weight and height. We didn't talk about his eyes, hair, or skin colour. we only know what the author told us, later we can have him see his reflection and examine himself, or we can have someone ask why his hair is X shade or many other things to determine various characteristics

Another thing to note is that we never went over character traits, things like how they act or behave around others. There are many archetypes, stereotypes, and cliches around these things like the Gary Stu, or the Emo, or the AEAPBMSIWC (As Edgy As Possible Because Mommy Said It Was Cool), and a bunch of other ones that I can't be asked to write down.

The point is to add emotion to your character, breathe life into them and make them a person instead of a machine, acting a certain way around friends, how they treat strangers, how they deal with problems and speech habits and patterns.

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 ***On Transgenders:** Why would you write that you, or your character, is transgender in your story? It's your story so if you always wanted to be a girl then just be a girl. This goes both ways, and if in the real world you can't afford to switch, then just be who you want to be in your story. If you are pulling a Mister Garrison and just switching back and forth as comedy, then that is different.


End file.
